I don’t want to brag, but I make some pretty chubby babies. My first born was a shocking 9 pounds and his baby brother was not to be outdone at 9 pounds 6 ounces.
My older son in particular never slept. I am only partially exaggerating. As an infant he would be awake for 8 hours at a time. And he loved to snuggle but he was not content to sit. We had to walk with him so he could look at everything. His little eyes would be wide and bright, just taking in the details of our surroundings.
And through the trials and drama of life and motherhood, he was always there. My little sidekick. Truthfully his intense personality was one of the things that forced me to hold it together when I thought I just might fall apart.
Our first baby changes us. They bust into our formerly organized and well- rested (mildly self absorbed) lives and mold us into experts on all things baby, people with softer hearts, and into a new person called mom.
My friend Carolyn over at Bison Booties did a great post the other day about babies growing up and I couldn’t agree with her more.
The thought of my sidekick turning into a big boy and sending him out into the world….well that makes me want to eat a whole lot of chocolate. And binge shop. And type all the sad face emojis.
But I won’t.
A few days ago I was looking at the schedules for the activities we have enrolled him in, feeling a mix of sadness and excitement, when I heard that still small voice of truth: be thankful.
I cannot believe my chubby, ever-awake little sidekick is now a tall and skinny string bean who is going to start preschool. But every time I want to think sad thoughts about this, I am going to replace them with one thought: thank you.
Thank you that he sleeps through the night.
Thank you for his quick wit and crazy plans.
Thank you that he is growing up healthy and strong.
Thank you for the front row seat to this little firecracker’s bright future.
He has a few years before he is actually grown up. Before he loses his first tooth even. But I know the time will go by in a blur. Gratitude in every phase is going to be the thing that keeps me from being the awkward, tear-streaked lady in the background of every picture.
Gratitude….and most likely chocolate.